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I transit twice a day. Morning and evening. I've started keeping a journal — not of events, but of weight. I write down which memories feel heavy before a transit and check them after. The heaviest ones get lighter. I don't know if that's grief processing or something else.
I've stopped telling my partner. They'd make me stop transiting. I need to transit.
There's a kid at Transit Hub Sigma — can't be older than nine — who sits outside the arrival bays watching people come out. I asked him what he was looking for. He said: "The ones who know."
I asked him what they know. He wouldn't say. He just looked at me for a long moment and then looked away.
I think I was one of the ones who know.
The S&P rep who came to my building's transit pod last month wasn't there for a maintenance check. I've done maintenance checks. They don't ask which residents use the pod most frequently. They don't take notes on paper.
I transit less now. I'm not sure if I'm protecting something or if what I'm protecting is already gone.